With anticipation and excitement I will greet them after a week away with their father for the first leg of their summer vacation. But how much do I focus on what they are doing now, without me and if they are having fun?
When my kids go away to visit my ex-husband, their father, the older they get the more I feel a stray. The emptiness in the house is loud and forceful. I try with all my might not to take it in; to hold my breath and not to inhale the stale desperation that lives and grows with every moment of their absence. Their visitation sometimes feels like I am in training for the ultimate separation -their life beyond living with me.